So I have this cat. His name is Alfonzo. He has caused me some moral dilemmas and all, including how and what to feed him, how to live with myself while feeding him his natural (I have a theory on this..but it is not what I'm discussing right now) diet of meat, and even whether I really should have him - I shouldn't have taken him away from his mother, siblings, his home..it was rather selfish of me to do it. But it is done, and I have grown to love him like crazy, and he happens to seem rather fond of me and my family as well.
And now he is very likely dying. We started letting him out recently, because our Wisconsin winter has been crazy warm these past few months. He really loves it, and spent a lot of time outside - and all of a sudden he started getting a little more lethargic - day before yesterday, he spent the day sleeping..he does this sometimes, so we weren't really worried. The next day, yesterday, he wouldn't eat or drink - and now today, he's stumbling around, barely able to stand, barely any response to his environment whatsoever.
He ingested rat poison. One day he is perfectly fine, running around, purring, curling up in our laps, playing, getting between my girl and I when we're making out - and three days later, we don't know how much longer he is going to live. It's a real eye opener - really, live every day like its your last, because you never know when that day really will come.
You know, this is all tragic, and horrible, and I hate everything about this... But it's really not just that that bothers me. It's the fact that people get all upset when their beloved pet ingests the stuff, but it doesn't matter to them, doesn't bother them at all... That they are knowingly, willingly, purposefully sentencing so many other innocent little animals to the same fate. And that's okay. What makes all those poor animals any less alive, any less deserving of life than the cat or dog who's owners will go to all lengths to help?
I told daddy that I assumed he would be getting rid of the rat poison (I hadn't known about it previously, but now that I do, it makes me want to fucking cry..) - and he told me that he would get a little contraption that would make it so only small animals can get at it. How is that supposed to make me feel any better? How is that supposed to make anything any better?
How can it be that people don't see, that they are so absorbed in their own world - that what they are doing is wrong. How can it be okay to kill? To take lives, destroy this one of a kind miracle - because they make us uncomfortable? How can we be do self absorbed, so selfish? When I mentioned this to Dad, it's like he couldn't even fathom it being so terrible that we are killing all of these innocent creatures. How can we have possibly become so, so desensitized? How can there be so few people that question the system, so few people out there who really, truly value life? We humans were given these incredible brains. This amazing ability to think, and reason, understand, and empathize. For what? We have all this ability, but we can't get over this disgusting, primal selfishness that seems so ingrained in us that we don't even notice anymore.
And more than that, when someone does, they are the ones that are wrong. Who do I think I am, saying you are a murderer for eating at Taco Bell? I am crazy to believe that it is wrong to kill things, innocent living things, inflict pain. I am naïve to think that I could ever make a difference.
And since I have got to end my post reminding myself and anyone who's read this far to keep a positive outlook, and that harmony, love, true world-wide peace can be achieved:
"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win."
I have said it before, but.. No matter how wrong, how downright fucked up and hopeless our world is, there are people out there. Good people. Brave people. Individuals, who know that things have to change, that evil can never win. That no matter how small we may seem, good has so much more power simply in words of love and truth, than anything corrupt, violent, sick, wrong, disgusting. So do something about it. Change the world, be that crazy, fanatic, naïve person - and let them call you crazy, fanatic, naïve for not bowing spinelessly to what society tells you is alright.